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When we first saw the words “Jersey Shore Shark Attack,” we immediately imagined that the Jersey Shore cast had returned to Miami for another season of embarrassing, drunken antics — and were tragically eaten alive in the waters of South Beach. (On-camera, one hoped.) It turns out that didn’t happen — but you will get to enjoy the next best thing.
not a headline but a made-for-TV movie set to debut on SyFy this
summer. And it’s boasting a cast that is truly Jerseylicious, including
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Tony Sirico, aka Paulie “Walnuts” from The Sopranos, and N’Sync’s own
Joey Fatone, appearing as … himself. The ladies of the cast are
basically unknown, but with character names like “Nooki,” we’re pretty
sure we’ll be loving to hate them just as much as their reality TV
counterparts.
The plot description sounds just a delightfully cheesy as SyFy’s other
fare: Angry, ravenous sharks terrorizing the Jersey Shore as Captain
Sallie (Sirico) and the rest of the cast fight to save their town —
and, we assume, undergo gruesome deaths complete with transparently
terrible special effects. We’re hoping this is the first in a trend of
science fiction parodies of reality tv shows. Kardashians vs. Loch Ness?
Bridezillas vs. Godzilla? Get on it, SyFy.
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