The Ten Best Things to Do in Miami This Weekend

Sweet holy Jesus, it's Friday, y'all! For five grueling days we've been schlepping on with our ridiculously mundane lives. But finally -- yes, finally -- we've arrived at the best part of the week: the weekend! Oh, weekend, how we love thee.Anyway, have you prepped your livers for all the...
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Sweet holy Jesus, it’s Friday, y’all! For five grueling days we’ve been schlepping on with our ridiculously mundane lives. But finally — yes, finally — we’ve arrived at the best part of the week: the weekend! Oh, weekend, how we love thee.

Anyway, have you prepped your livers for all the alcohol this weekend? Have you plenty of bottled water to rid you of the toxins from whatever pills you pop? Hey, we’re not shy, and we’re definitely not ignorant. Ultra’s this weekend, so at the very least, prep your corneas for abundant sightings of glitter and spandex everywhere. Take a cab, walk, or bike where you can. And don’t forget: Biscayne Boulevard northbound near Downtown is closed for the fest.

Are we leaving anything out? Oh, yeah, have an effing amazing time.

So, without further ado, here are the 10 best things to do in our soon-to-be liquid glitter-covered and neon spandex-infested city.

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Friday

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Saturday

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