The best satire is the kind that doesn’t quite flagrantly cross the line of bad taste and coarse affront, yet still manages to crap all over its intended victim with comical results. And that’s the subtle brilliance of Forbidden Broadway, which opened last night at the Arsht Center’s Carnival Studio…
If you like low scoring games with shitloads of punting, dropped touchdown passes, coaches tripping players running down the sideline, corner backs with hands of stone, and really repulsive quarterback play, then Sunday’s showdown between the Miami Dolphins and New York Jets was right up your alley!The Dolphins pulled off…
It was the team’s sixth straight victory after their much ballyhooed loss to the Dallas Mavericks three weeks ago when LeBron James slammed into Erik Spoelstra during a team time-out. The bump sent the media in a tizzy and blew up the YouTubes with repeat viewings of the incident. But…
When Bill Parcells took reign and became the big kahuna of football for the Miami Dolphins in 2009, he drafted tackle Jake Long (instead of current MVP-candidate, quarterback Matt Ryan) when he had the first overall pick. It was a good, safe pick. And, unfortunately, that seemed to set the…
There’s a sort of unofficial rivalry between the Miami Heat and their Monday-night opponent, the Dallas Mavericks. It all started with Dwyane Wade’s otherworldly performance against Dallas in the 2006 NBA Finals; He crotch-clobbered the favored Mavs with a Jordane-esque showing in games three through six. When the Mavs took…
The Miami Dolphins fell to the Cleveland Browns 13-10 on Sunday in a game that was probably the worst-case scenario for making an argument that American football is exciting.While both teams’ offenses did their darndest to lull you into unconsciousness, there was a palpable feeling during the game that the…
Cleveland fans booed mercilessly. They held up signs that read “Quitness” and “Liar Baby Jerk.” ESPN’s Bill Simmons said LeBron James and the Heat just wouldn’t be ready for the heavy doses of venom they would receive from the Cavaliers fans. It was going to be an ugly, raucous atmosphere…
This might be the first you’ve heard of it, but apparently LeBron James used to play for the Cleveland Cavaliers. And over the summer, after his seven-year contract with the Cavaliers expired, he decided to go play for the Miami Heat with his good friends Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh.The…
The Heat Haters have had their Christmas come early this year with all the drama and turmoil slamming the Miami Heat the last few weeks. They’ve stumbled out of the gate, lost their heart and soul player Udonis Haslem for most of the year, and are losing games to the…
Breaking news: Nothing happened in a meeting between University of Miami Athletic Director Kirby Hocutt and ESPN Monday Night Football analysts Jon Gruden this morning.The Miami Herald is reporting that The U will not be making any head coaching announcements today, even though ESPN and twitter and SI.com and that…
A Bill Parcells-led team has not won a playoff game since the Clinton administration. He’s notorious for moving from one organization to the next on a whim. He left the Dallas Cowboys a mess and is routinely given way too much credit for the new Giants teams he coached (but…
Former WBC heavyweight champion Oliver McCall is 45 years old. But you wouldn’t know it by looking at his rock-hard physique. He can kill most men with his mustache. McCall is 54-10 with 37 knockouts in his career, and now he’s looking to become the oldest heavyweight champion in boxing…
Ever since the Miami Heat’s not-so-stellar season debut, the media (along with some incurably irrational Heat fans) has been accusing the team of being “soft.” And while the media fails to tell us exactly what it means to be that way (Are the guys soft like Charmin or soft like…
On a night where the NFL Network previewed an upcoming documentary on Bill Parcells and his football genius, the Dolphins team he built was busy rushing for 39 total-yards and throwing for 187 on their way to their first shutout loss in three seasons. The Dolphins were manhandled and dominated…
Stuffed with turkey and tired of chasing sales on Black Friday? Why not spend the evening reveling in a good, old-fashioned reckoning, Miami Heat-style. That’s what the holidays are all about! Because pretty much everyone in the nation outside Miami has come to loathe the Heat as they abhor ruthless…
Apparently, the local beat writers that cover the Miami Dolphins at the Sun-Sentinel and Miami Herald have been sniping at each other the last couple of days. It’s mainly been done on twitter, because you can really zing a guy in 140 characters or less.You want to know what’s going…
It took three quarterbacks to do it, but the Miami Dolphins were able to pull off the 29-17 victory over the Tennessee Titans on Sunday, earning the Fins their first home win of the season. That’s the good news. The bad news? The entire starting roster is injured and out…
“It’s reality now. The chemistry isn’t at the level of these good teams.” So said LeBron James following the Heat’s 112-107 loss the Boston Celtics Thursday night at the American Airlines Arena. The Heat have now dropped 13 of the last 14 regular season meetings to the Celtics, have fallen to…
The Miami Heat host the Boston Celtics tonight at the American Airlines Arena. But did you know Miami is 5-3 eight games into the 2010-11 NBA season? They are! And because they’ve turned into The Most Irrationally Reviled Team In The Universe, sports writers, commentators and fans alike have all…
When your kicker is the team’s MVP, you know something is wrong. Yet it’s been that kind of season for the Miami Dolphins. It’s been that kind of decade, actually. The Fins are ranked 28th in the league in scoring this season. They have no problem moving the ball into…
The old adage that it’s hard for a team to win if it can’t score has become something the Florida Panthers have taken seriously this season. Led by Marty Reasoner, Mike Weaver, and Dennis Widemen, the Panthers’ stifling defense has allowed only four goals on power plays this season. That’s…
First Miami Sports News was all about the Heat’s Chris Bosh being traded. Then, Miami Sports News was all about the Dolphins’ Chad Henne being benched in favor of Chad Pennington. You so crazy, Miami Sports News! Oh… wait… this just in…. one of these things is actually happening…
