Twenty tar balls washed up on the shores of Key West today, but because sometimes tar balls occur naturally, and other times they’re the product of those less dramatic, everyday ways we pollute our oceans (i.e., the shipping industry), it won’t be known if they’re from the Gulf of Mexico…
Hey, Democratic Party of Florida, you do realize that you’re supposed to win elections don’t you? You’re aware that President Obama won this state in 2008, and that you have a pretty hefty voter registration advantage over Republicans? You know that your main competitor in the Governors race is a…
>Even in the animal kingdom, it seems that some ladies can’t get enough of a bad boy. Tilikum, the orca who killed a veteran trainer during a performance in March, has impregnated two females at SeaWorld Orlando. Apparently, he’s quite the sperm whale.Twenty-year-old whale, Taima will give birth to her fourth…
Fourty-three-year-old Hernan Lazaro Concepcion has been charged with kidnapping and lewd and lascivious exhibition after allegations that he attempted to rape a four-year-old girl Sunday afternoon.The victim and her mother were attending a barbecue at their apartment complex, where Concepcion was also present. The mother realized her daughter had gone…
Despite the pleas of New York’s local media, it seems that LeBron James will not be heading to join the Knicks. Or so says Charles Oakley, a former Knicks player and close pal of LeBron. “Chicago or Miami. Not New York. He’s leaving,” Oakley told the New York Daily News.Hmmm, the…
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It seems that it’s a universal law that local news anchors cannot say the word “penis” on air without things turning wildly unprofessional. While this latest local example isn’t anywhere near as bizarre as the “So, she’s enjoying the penis a bit more, is she?” viral sensation out of New…
South Beach was kind of insane this weekend. More so than usually. Exxxotica brought an ever-so-slight rise in the amount of creepy dudes and blonde girls with fake tits and sad eyes, while the multiple roving gains of lesbians on Vespas can be attributed to Aqua Girl. A friend and…
Florida Highway Patrol Patrick Ambroise was parked on the shoulder of the Florida Turnpike, most likely running a radar on traffic, when his patrol car was hit from behind by a Lexus. The collision sparked a fire in the patrol car, and the officer died on the scene. The accident…
The Social Security Administration released their list of the most popular babies names in 2009 by state. The most popular boys name in Florida? Jayden.Which is a name we usually associate with porn stars (either busty bimbos or twinky gay porn bottoms). Seriously, take off your content restrictions and put…
When news broke that Charlie Crist would run for Senate as an independent, it was speculated that he’d spend the rest of his term as governor issuing a few controversial vetoes that would separate him from the Republican party. He already did so with the education bill, and is now…
Are you ready for Governor Lawton Chiles 2.0? Alex Sink sure isn’t.Naked Politics reports that Lawton Chiles III is considering making a late entrance into the governor’s race as a democrat. Alex Sink, the state’s CFO, has been running for nearly a year now and was considered a lock to…
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Today’s the day when the U.S. Soccer Federation submits its final bid to host either the 2018 or 2022 World Cup. Despite the fact that only 12 cities are needed, the bid includes 18 cities.Miami’s role in the bid gets special prominence, because, according to AP reports, we’ve been chosen to…
It’s one of the great college football injustices that during the past two decades or so, the Miami Hurricanes have had only one yearly heated rivalry.Those damn Fighting Irish and Gators pulled out of the annual matchups in ’90 and ’87, respectively. Miami has met Florida sporadically (and will again in 2013), but…
Maybe you’ve heard about how Coconut Grove Elementary School principal Eva N. Ravelo accidentally sent an email to a parent telling her to “eat sh– and die.” We here at Riptide are of course shocked and saddened. Shocked and saddened that a person leading an institution meant to enrich our young…
Trains, forklifts, planes, and automobiles. Today’s News Roundup has it all. In terms of stealing major amounts of cash from a bank, just straight jacking the ATM always seems like the dumbest, the messiest, and, consequently, usually the most hilarious. A Bank of America branch at 9890 Bird Rd. in…
North Miami Beach Police Officer John Baker was conducting a routine search for a burglary suspect at an apartment building and decided to knock on neighbors’ doors to see if they had any information. When he knocked on the door of apartment number 9 he didn’t get any new information…
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Apparently when a Christianity Today story on our George Rekers scandal story went up yesterday at around noon, the doctor was still listed as a member of the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality’s Scientific Advisor Committee. A quick look today reveals that he’s been scrubbed even from…
Anytime a woman who doesn’t quite fit the norms of what society deems feminine gains some influence in American politics, it seems lesbian rumors follow. Go ask the ghost of Eleanor Roosevelt, or, for someone living who you might actually run into in Miami, Donna Shalala or Janet Reno.Though, the…
The Miami Bridge Youth and Family Services Center provides emergency food, shelter and consoling for troubled youth and their families. Now, two teen girls disappeared from the center on the same day, and police are asking for the public’s help in finding them. Sixteen-year-old Amanda Nazario suffers from bi-polar disorder,…
