Getting’ Knitty Wit It

Who told you knitting was for octogenarians? Local designer Karelle Levy is throwing that idea on its head by producing unique, colorful pieces that are anything but that sweater your granny gave you for Christmas ’88. One look at Levy’s hooked-up confections and you won’t dare think some bespectacled bitty…

Blow out the Candles, Diva

Ingrid B has been South Florida’s pied piper of spoken word and soul music for years, leading folks away from the fray of parties where “they don’t dance no mo’” (as Goodie Mob put it) and injecting them with her unique brand of entertainment. Artists and party people alike have…

Hit Haagen Dazs for a Free Bee-Built Cone

haagenTemps are supposed to coast into the high 80s today and Mother Nature couldn’t have picked a better day to turn the heat up – Haagen Dazs is giving away free scoops of any bee-built flavor. No, not a frozen chocolate concoction thrown together by lil’ hard-hatted bees sporting distressed…

Magic City Kitty: A Cure for the Common Cock

Hello, KittyI’m a 41-year-old woman and have been married to the same guy for 15 years. I am thinking of taking a lover because my husband does not fulfill me sexually, and I can’t stand it anymore. When we met, he had a problem of finishing fast, but with time…

Hot, Buttered Soul

Your moose-hatin’ cousin from Alaska comes to Miami to party at a club with four floors, 13 in-house DJs, and the intimacy of a sardine can, but you have more sense, dear little party animal. You prefer a soiree filled with people who are too cool for McClubs, and even…

Art, Straight from the Ahol

With a beard like tar-soaked cotton candy and a mouthful of 24-karat dental work, Alouishous San Gomma is hard to miss. And lucky for our cultural landscape, the Hialeah-born artist and winner of Colt 45’s Ink the Can Contest produces pieces that are just as loud — his weapon of…

Yo Mama’s So Special

If the thought never crosses your mind the other 364 days, the second Sunday in May has been designated as the 24 hours you should lavish gifts upon the woman (or the more nurturing of two dads) who raised you. What recession? Even the biggest douchebag could find it in…

Return the Favor

If you want to see Miamians get all glossy-eyed and nostalgic, mention Miami Marine Stadium. Back in 1963, this Virginia Key landmark was built for powerboat racing, but its legendary floating stage soon became the place to watch concerts, boxing matches, the annual Easter Sunrise Service, and even an episode…

Reel Them into B.E.D.

Damn the sticky floors at your local megaplex. Club B.E.D. hosts a movie experience you’ve seen only in your caviar dreams. The loungey spot has teamed up with SoBe staple and foreign flick mecca New Concept Video to bring feature films and prix fixe tapas to a Thursday night near…

I Have a Basket, No Bell

If there’s a banana seat imprint on your bum and handbrake marks on your palms, the world will think you’re a badass. Because nothing will stop you from riding your bike. There’s a name for people like you. Rad. And you, rad, should join the cruising pack of cool kids…

These Jobs Only Kinda Blow

To date, the porn industry presents the most compelling argument for discarding the oft-repeated rule about not mixing business with pleasure. If Hef had followed that rule, we wouldn’t have Playboy, and there’s no existence bleaker than one without tastefully raunchy spreads featuring top-heavy Bunnies. Support America’s cash cow —…

Shecky Has a Stimulus Plan

Everybody is talking about money these days, but we say shut it and choose: paper or plastic? Every budget can squeeze in a shopping spree at prices that are discounted up to 75 percent off, and twice a year, fashion/beauty/nightlife guru Shecky’s rolls into town with trunks full of gear…

Kill Me, Hitchcock

The murderous Bob Rusk has robbed Babs of her life, but she has posthumously returned the favor by grasping in her cold, stiff hand the pin from his lapel. As much as he wants to abandon the accessory, he knows it could lead to his capture and ruin all chances…

For the Fashionably Conscious

The fashion circle of life begins with a designer creating a sketch and ends with works of wearable art, composed for special occasions or everyday use. This Saturday, museum-worthy pieces from Roberto Cavalli, Luca Luca, and Onda de Mar swimwear will be on display on the Fashion Art Ball’s runway…

Your Stories Put Me to Sleep, Daddy

People have spun tall tales of love and adventure since the beginning of time. Prior to history books and the World Wide Web, storytelling was the only means to learn of our past selves and keep cultural traditions thriving. Sure, the stories were a bit embellished and fashioned so that…

Around the World in 4 BPM

During the four years of Khmer Rouge’s horrific reign of terror, 1.5 million civilian deaths overshadowed the rise of Cambodia’s rollicking and unique music scene. Developed before the Communist movement began its destruction, the genre — a mashup of Eastern flavors and our very own rock ’n’ roll — is…

Totally Erotic, Dude

Typical surfboard art might range from tiger stripes to spray-painted rock ’n’ roll hand signs, but the work on display this Tuesday at the World Erotic Art Museum will change what you think hanging ten is all about. Controversial artist Gregory de la Haba — whose sculptural installation of taxidermic…

Give in to the Gravitational Pool

Grab your yellow ducky float and meet the cool kids poolside at Solé on the Ocean each Sunday. This oceanfront condo/hotel is rolling out Alba, a weekly pool party where DJ Baby Dre provides the soundtrack, Epicure Market supplies the chicest lunch box since your rusty red Alf one, and…