It’s 2012, not 1999, so we’re not really usually in the market for YouTube-hosted parody songs of Eminem’s breakout hit “My Name Is.”But then again, those parodies usually don’t expertly roast Miami Dolphins general manager Jeff Ireland…
For the third time since 2008 the Miami Hurricanes are on the hunt for a new athletics director. Don’t worry though, University of Miami President Donna Shalala says she has heard from literally hundreds of people who wants the job. “I’m getting hundreds of emails from people wanting the job,”…
In a game that featured absolutely putrid calls on the field by the recently-returned “professional” refs, the Dolphins managed to hold off the Cincinnati Bengals for a 17-13 win. An overall sloppy game for both teams was sealed when safety Reshad Jones intercepted Andy Dalton with 1:22 left in the…
The Heat will travel to China next week for two preseason games against the LA Clippers, and fans in the country are basketball-crazy, perhaps even more so than in America. Hell, they worship Shane Battier. Seriously, dude’s face is apparently plastered all over billboards, and he’s nicknamed “Mr. President.”…
Is Ozzie Guillen’s time in Miami over? It’s hard to imagine a more disastrous season for a manager. Not only did the man manage to piss off half of his fan base by declaring his “love” for Fidel Castro, but he also sunk a promising start into a prolonged team…
Seems like the University of Miami can’t hold onto an athletic director. Current AD Shawn Eichorst officially offered his resignation today and will take the same job at the University of Nebraska. This will be the second athletic director in a row UM has lost to a bigger school…
Every week, Riptide’s crack team of employment termination scientists gauge just how fireable loathed Dolphins General Manager Jeff Ireland has become following his latest series of horrific blunders. So how close is the Ginger Menace to getting canned this week?Late yesterday, word spread that the Dolphins had cut wide receiver…
You’d think Philadelphia would use a basketball superstar from their own team to try and push that brown crystal, but you have to remember that Philadelphia’s basketball team is the 76ers and they don’t have much in the way of star power right now.So, apparently heroin dealers in the City…
Now is the season of Miami’s discontent, thanks to our terrible local teams. The Dolphins are a joke. The Marlins are even worse than last year. The University of Miami Hurricanes aren’t much better, losing to Kansas State by 39 points. The Florida Panthers are locked out. And South Florida’s…
For the second week in a row, the Dolphins failed to capitalize on opportunities to close out a game and lost an overtime game they should have won. Given the “Cardiac Cards” moniker Arizona has earned as of late, you had to figure this game would get wild towards the…
Sports teams are like Hollywood movies: sometimes they can be so bad they’re actually good. Such is the case with the Miami Marlins, who are quickly becoming the Snakes on a Plane of professional baseball. More than seven years ago, Adam Greenberg was called up by the Chicago Cubs for…
I guess it’s only fair that since the Miami Heat have the undisputed best basketball player in the world that they should also have the worst player in the entire league.To no one’s surprise, ESPN’s experts today put LeBron James atop their #NBARank listicle, which is kind of hilarious because last…
It’s never a good sign when a baseball team’s locker room drama is so much more interesting to follow then their on field efforts.The fish fight between Miami Marlins manager Ozzie Guillen and pitcher Heath Bell continues with Guillen throwing the latest bomb. It’s not that he’s lost respect for…
Last week, we introduced “Fire Jeff Ireland Watch,” Riptide’s newest feature, where our crack team of employment termination scientists gauge just how fireable the Dolphins loathed general manager is at the moment following his latest series of horrific blunders. This week, the Ginger Devil’s awful drafting, terrible personnel decisions and general…
Last night, the NFL’s replacement referee situation turned into the controversial clusterfuck we all feared. It’s been pretty much the only thing the sports world has been talking about all day, including Miami players. Obviously, Miami Dolphins players chimed in on Twitter with rookie Kevyn Scott wondering if Roger Goddel…
Things aren’t looking good for Miami Marlins manager Ozzie Guillen. With rumors that his job may be on the hot seat, the team’s reliever Heath Bell told WQAM host Dan Sileo today that he’s been having a hard time trying to respect the controversial and often outspoken Guillen…
The Miami Marlins first season in their taxpayer-funded Little Havana palacio has been nothing short of a catastrophe; the team was out of contention by August and so boring and terrible that the Franchise — the Showtime series chronicling the club’s season — ended early after star Hanley Ramirez got…
There was a time when kicker Dan Carpenter was responsible for the majority of the points the Dolphins scores, and could be relied upon to line up and bang out a field goal — from seemingly any distance — with a twirl of his flowing locks. That time is gone…
If this game was a fancy four course meal it would have started out with the greatest soup ever. Seinfeld Soup Nazi level soup. You’d be content with eating nothing but this soup for the rest of your life. Then the second course comes around and the waiter serves you…
When it comes to sports, there is a long and storied tradition of punking rookies. First-year professional ballers have being forced to wear Justin Bieber backpacks or had their SUVs filled with popcorn, for example. Some high school sports teams even make their rookies dip their genitals in Icy Hot…
Brian Hartline has no patience for the talentless yet super famous. The Dolphins wide receiver is scratching his head over “Tebowmania” and basically equated the whole thing to the Kardashian kraze…
Former NFL player Chad Johnson and Basketball Wives star Evelyn Lozada were officially divorced earlier this morning. The two had only wed over the July 4th weekend following a romance that was chronicled both on Lozada’s VH1 reality show and in the gossip press, but Johnson was arrested just weeks…
