Dolphins fans have a right to be concerned about Brandon Marshall’s play last season and the legal situation stemming form his wife stabbing him in the gut with a kitchen knife, but is the best solution to that really signing a guy who just got out of a jail yesterday…
Assuming there even is an NFL season this year (even one that is only eight games long), the Miami Dolphins will find themselves once again in a tough quarterback situation. There’s been murmurs about signing a free agent all off-season, and the latest rumors center around the Tennessee Titan’s Vince…
Nothing screams “I Am A Righteous Ass Kicking Machine” quite like overcoming one of the NBA Finals worst collapses, an officiating crew that absolutely refused to call any fouls for you but insisted on blowing the whistle if you so much as breathed on the giant German, and having one…
For game 3 of the NBA Finals against the Mavericks, the Miami Heat will be going on the road and into unpleasant territory. Not just unpleasant for opposing professional sports teams — we’re talking bad for everybody.There has been plenty of good-natured trash talk bouncing back and forth — cries…
The dozen or so people who can make a serious claim to being true Florida Marlins fans are stoked that his may be the year for the Florida Marlins! The year the team finally loses a playoff series! The Fish currently have a .574 record. That’s the fourth best in…
In these still shady economic times, placing a bet on the Miami Heat seemed as sound an investment plan as any. At least, that’s probably what rapper and Cash Money Records co-founder Birdman thought. He announced on Twitter that he made a $2 million bet on the Miami Heat in…
The Miami Heat were on the verge of taking a commanding 2-0 series lead, had a 15-point lead in the fourth quarter, had Dwyane Wade back to his nut-punching ways, were alley-ooping and dunking and partying like it was 2006, and even had Mike Bibby scoring points. And then, of…
Of the three referees assigned to game two between the Heat and Mavericks, one was suspended in 2007 for challenging Tim Duncan to a fight, another spent five months in jail, and the third once ejected the Celtics’ Paul Pierce for, well, no one really knows what. All three of…
Oye, Guanabacoa’s most famous resident since Rick Sanchez is guaranteeing the Miami Heat will pick up its second Larry O’Brian O’Brien trophy in the NBA Finals.In his latest YouTube video, Pepe Billete explains why the Dallas Mavericks suck ass while partaking in one of his favorite past times. We’ve loosely translated…
As the Miami Heat are on the hunt for the second NBA Championship, the big man who helped them secure their first has announced his retirement from professional basketball. After 19 seasons in the NBA, four championships rings, 15 trips to the All-Star Game, an MVP award and six teams,…
The NBA Finals feels like Miami versus the World, but there’s at least an entire other nation rooting wildly for the Heat: The Philippines. Yes, Coach Erik Spoelstra’s mother is a native of the Pacific nation, and Spoelstra is the first Filipino-American head coach of any major North American professional…
If you’re a fan of low scoring games, low-percentage shooting and sleep depravity, then Game 1 of the NBA Finals was the game for you!LeBron James scored 24 while Dwyane Wade added 22 and Chris Bosh went for 19 as the Miami Heat took down the Dallas Mavericks 92-84 to…
These days, everyone is weighing in on the rivalry between the Miami Heat and the Dull-ass Mavericks. Even God.As the Pope’s duly appointed representative in South Florida, Archbishop of Miami Thomas Wenski has astutely wagered that the Heat will take the NBA title. Unsurprisingly, his Dallas counterpart, Bishop Kevin Farrell,…
LeBron James may be on the brink of winning Miami an NBA Championship. Man that’ll feel almost as good as that time the Miami Hurricanes beat Ohio State in the 2003 Fiesta Bowl to take home the BCS Championship. Oh wait…James is seriously testing our Miami sports fan heart strings…
Dear America:We address you as ambassadors of sorts from the culturally sovereign nation of Miami-Dade. It has recently come to our attention that the “Miami Heat,” a professional sporting concern that represents our city in your National Basketball Association, has advanced to a series that will crown this organization’s annual…
The non-stop criticism of LeBron James turned ugly when haters started taking aim not just the Heat but at their fans and Miami itself. They said our city is shallow. They said we didn’t cheer hard enough at home games. They said we didn’t deserve this team. They said we…
The Miami Heat left the Chicago Bulls wounded last night, and who’s come along to rub in the salt? None other than Scottie Pippen. Michael Jordan’s former right-hand-man was on ESPN’s Mike and Mike in the Morning today and said that LeBron James might actually be a better basketball player…
Every single person that has ever uttered or written or tweeted or thought the word “LeBrick” can help themselves to a dick chipotle. Because with 3:12 remaining in the game, and the Heat down by 12, LeBron James obliterated the Chicago Bulls’ vaunted defense like an ass-kicking machine with the…
There were thousands of fans at Thursday night’s watch party at the American Airlines Arena to see the Chicago Bulls fold like a fitted sheet in the final seconds and lose 83-80 to the Heat, who will face Dallas for the NBA crown. But only two attendees of the “White…
The Chicago Bulls’ Joakim Noah’s “fuck you, faggot” outburst during the Eastern Conference Finals against the Miami Heat was one thing (certainly an inexcusable thing, but not something that necessarily makes him a raging homophobe). Tim Hardaway’s 2007 outburst in which he stated, “I hate gay people… I am homophobic,” was on…
The Dallas Mavericks earned a spot in the NBA Finals Wednesday night with their 100-96 win over the Oklahoma City Thunder, which means once the Heat finally put the Chicago Bulls out of their misery tonight, all that stands between Miami and a national title is a shaggy, horse-toothed German…
First off: Is there any better evidence that the Miami Heat’s Big Three is really a two-headed beast than the fact that Dwyane Wade and LeBron James always hold a tandem press conference with Chris Bosh later speaking to reporters alone? If this team is a circus, Wade and LeBron…
