Jose Canseco’s Got A New Brand New Gig: Low-Minor Leagues Player-Manager

In his Sisyphean quest to continually one-up his latest absurd headlines, local hero-clown Jose Canseco faced a steep challenge this week: How to best his shenanigans in Hollywood, where he sent his brother Ozzie to fight in his place at a D-list celebrity boxing match?

Well, here’s a start: Jose and Ozzie are both headed to sunny Yuma, Arizona where they’ll be co-player managers for the famed Scorpions of the independent North American League. How’s the NAL’s drug-testing policy?

League President Kevin Outcalt — who obviously hasn’t seen the photos of Canseco’s recent press conferences — predicts the ex-Bash Bro will bring fans flocking to the ballpark.

“I think it’s exciting for Yuma,” Outcalt tells the Yuma Sun. “It’s going to be a lot of fun. Jose is a very accomplished player, he has a lot of sway in the media and in pop culture, and he’s bringing that to the city.”

Canseco will manage the team and play, while Ozzie will be hitting coach, bench coach and will also take the field.

He might just need the gig.

Celebrity boxing promoter Damon Feldman has filed a lawsuit against Canseco for pulling a switcheroo at the boxing match (a saga captured forever by Taiwan’s finest animators.) He says he fronted Canseco $5,000 before the fight after he said he needed the cash to help pay for his dad’s funeral.

“I felt bad for Jose, but I don’t feel bad now,” Feldman tells the AP. “I feel bad for myself.”

Canseco, meanwhile, counters that Feldman knew Ozzie would be fighting in his place because Jose was “dealing with severe depression” over his dad’s death and had thrown out his back on the way to Miami.

Should be a fun ride for the Scorpions, whose recent highlights including trading their entire team for a Colombian squad and threatening to move to Mexico. Hang on, Yuma!

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