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You can always tell when a politician is lying by whether their lips are moving. Those dirty bastards will say anything to get your vote.
Luckily, Uncle Luke is not a politician. (At least, we hope not). He is running for Miami-Dade County mayor, though. And he’s using the same tactics that got him fame in the music business to try and get you out to the polls.
That means a campaign strategy full of club appearances that will see him promote his tax-a-ho plan that the media loves, but strippers hate.
Check the cut to find out where he’ll be this week.
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Tonight Uncle Luke hosts a party at Club Play on South Beach, ’cause … Hey, nighttime freaks are daytime voters.
Tomorrow night, he’ll be at Grand Central for an adults and professionals night out with an “old-school music DJ,” and a 25-and-up age requirement, and an enforced dress code. Personally, we hate adults and professionals. But maybe they vote too.
Then this Sunday, Luke will be at SoBe Live for a spring break party that will likely be attended by 90% out of towners. We’re guessing he’s just doing this one for the money. Maybe he is a politician after all.
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