305 Photo of the Day: Tourist Central
Today’s photo comes from SeanWasHere’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group.Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
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What Would Stop Jeb Bush From Running For President in 2016? Money, Marco Rubio, and the Bush Brand
This fall’s presidential race was the first since 1976 where neither a Bush nor a Clinton took part as a candidate, running mate, or primary contender. But by the looks of things there’s a good possibility we’ll see a Bush (not to mention a Clinton) contending in 2016. The New…
Walmart Workers Protest Black Friday in Miami
While scores of Miamians lined up to get deals on $2.99 waffle presses and half-priced flat screens, or whatever it is that whips those Black Friday shoppers up into a frenzy, several disgruntled Walmart workers were there to great them.The local workers joined a national movement protesting Walmart’s questionable treatment…
First Snow of the Season: Coast Guard Offloading a Ton of Cocaine in Miami
Miami Beach experienced its first snowfall of the season this morning as Coast Guard officials offloaded nearly a ton of cocaine at their Miami Beach station this morning. Weighing in at 1,851 pounds, the 42 bales of cocaine are estimated to have a street value of about $22 million…
Be Thankful a Car Didn’t Crash Through Your Home Like One Did in Pinecrest
We’re sure Xavier Vandelanotte had a lot to be thankful for yesterday, but we wouldn’t blame him for not feeling too happy that a Dodge ended up crashing into his home late last night. The incident happened at Southwest 128th Street and 71st Avenue. At the time Vandelanotte was spending…
Florida Man Arrested for Twisting 2-Year-Old Boy’s Nipples Off
An inappropriate game of titty twister has lead to tragedy in New Port Richie, Florida. 28-year-old Thomas Matheson was arrested Tuesday night after twisting a two-year-old boy’s nipples so hard they actually came off…
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LaTrice Royale: Drag Royalty
With a full wig and high heels, she towers close to seven feet tall. She unapologetically flaunts her buxom frame, often draped in bright, curve-hugging outfits. Yet by far the biggest thing about LaTrice Royale is her spirit. On the most recent season of RuPaul’s Drag Race — the Logo…
TM Sisters: Profoundly Unpredictable
It’s hard to find a medium the TM sisters haven’t touched. The Miami-born duo of Monica Lopez De Victoria, who is 31, and her sister, 29-year-old Tasha Lopez De Victoria, has at times dabbled in painting, video art, performance, electrical engineering, videogame programming, costume making, roller skating, and synchronized swimming…
Is This The Most Horrifically Over Photoshopped South Florida Magazine Cover Ever?
We were just over at the closest super market to our office trying to pick up a snack, but ended up too horrified to eat when we got a glimpse of the magazine rack. Hold back on the photoshop Simply The Best magazine, because whatever you’re doing is downright disturbing. …
Mark Buehrle on Marlins: “I Was Lied to on Multiple Occasions”
Pitcher Mark Buehrle is packing his bags for Toronto thanks to the trade that shall not be named, and he’s none too happy about it. Buehrle and his agent Jeff Berry issued a statement today claiming that the Marlins straight up lied to him. …
305 Photo of the Day: Beak on Break
Today’s photo comes from Viper1165’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group…
Tom Wolfe’s Miami-Epic Back to Blood Shortlisted for Bad Sex in Fiction Award
After year’s of hype, Tom Wolfe’s Miami-set epic novel Back to Blood arrived to savage literary reviews and a telling indifference from local book readers. That doesn’t mean the tome isn’t getting any literary award love. It’s been nominated for the very prestigious “Bad Sex in Fiction” award by the…
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Florida Woman Busted for Public Blow Job Says She Was Just Looking for Cigarettes in 78 Year-Old’s Crotch
Smokers always be losing their cigarettes packs. Where do those things even end up half the time? I mean, a 78 year-old man’s crotch is as good as a place as any to search.Unfortunately for Karnesha Nantz, 32, police up in Stuart, Florida, were not buying such a story…
NCAA Tells Former Hurricanes Players They’ll Be Considered Guilty Unless They Cooperate in Shapiro Scandal Investigation
For the NCAA, it’s not innocent until proven guilty. Apparently, it’s guilty unless you cooperate with us. It seems there’s no such thing as pleading the fifth in the NCAA’s bylaws.In a move completely unheard of before, the NCAA has sent out letters to former Miami Hurricanes players informing them…
Could Rick Scott Face a Republican Primary Challenger?
Some Democrats are already smiling like they’ve got Florida’s 2014 gubernatorial race in the bag, and with Rick Scott’s consistently abysmal poll numbers, it’s easy to see why. Though, that also might explain while there’s a brewing interest among some GOP circles to see someone run against Scott in a…
Jose L. Alberto, Former Miami Beach Code Officer, Sentenced to 51 Months in Prison for Nightclub Shakedown Scheme
Jose L. Alberto, Miami Beach’s former top code compliance officer, has been sentence to 51 months behind bars after pleading guilty to charges related to a scam in which he shook down South Beach club owners…
305 Photo of the Day: Cat Fight
Today’s photo comes from JWKeith’s Flickr. If you’d like to see your photo here join our Flickr group.Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes…
Ozzie Guillen Biopic in the Works
While Ozzie Guillen’s Miami story may have come to a quick and bizarre end, his life story may be coming to the big screen. Actor John Ortiz is reportedly meeting with Ozzie in the hopes of turning the controversial skipper’s life into a Hollywood movie…
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U.S. Troops Make Shot-By-Shot Remake of Dolphins Cheerleaders’ “Call Me Maybe” Video in Afghanistan
Remember when the Miami Dolphins cheerleaders made a lip-dub video to Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe” during their bikini-filled calendar shoot? Well, U.S. troops in Afghanistan certainly do. In fact, they were so taken by the video they decided to do a shot-by-shot remake.Of course, some substitutes had to…
Marco Rubio Clarifies He’s Not in a Rap Beef with Pitbull
Marco Rubio didn’t exactly have the nicest things to say about either Miami rapper Pitbull or the field of science in his interview with GQ published yesterday. He claimed Pit wasn’t a poet, and cast doubt on generally accepted science that the earth is 4.5 billion years old. He’s since…
13-Year-Old Girl Shot and Killed on School Bus; Boy in Custody
A 13-year-old girl is in the Miami Children’s Hospital after being shot on the school bus on her way to school this morning. Update: The girl has now been pronounced dead.Meanwhile, a male student is currently in police custody in relation to the shooting…
MLB Officially Approves Marlins-Blue Jays Trade
Well, Bud Selig was no help.The MLB has officially approved the trade between the Miami Marlins and Toronto Blue Jays which saw pretty much every Marlins player of not named Giancarlo Stanton up north…