Jersey Shore Damage Report: Ronnie Is The Worst Human Ever

Sorry, folks, we weren’t here to recap last week’s Jersey Shore because someone literally cut the cable wire outside our house and then we got a debilitating sore throat. It was horrible. Not as horrible as actually watching this show, but still horrible.But we’re back to documenting the antics of…

Former County Employee Arrested for Child Porn

In today’s roundup of the sins of South Florida: A former county employee faces 20 charges of child pornography, a man is killed after a fight at a South Beach club, a veteran security guard is mysteriously found dead behind a dollar store in Southwest Dade, two men are arrested…

Jeff Greene’s Boat Summerwind is the “Levi Johnston of Yachts”

Today, New York Times columnist Gail Collins tackled the tricky subject of billionaire Florida Democratic Senate candidate Jeff Greene. She calls the man’s 145 party boat the Summerwind the “Levi Johnston of Yachts” because it’s “an embarrassing, headline-making connection.” Riptide has regrettably been sleeping on the yacht-troversy as of late,…

Water Park To Be Built at Sun Life Stadium

In today’s new roundup, which surprisingly isn’t full of that many terrible things: Sun Life Stadium may now have a new wet and wild neighbor, two pilots crash a plane in a canal but survive, the DUI teacher won’t be returning to class, and Zoo Miami wants your votes for…

Miami Ranked Sixth Most Stressed City

Miami is a popular travel destination for those looking to let loose of stress — what, with our beaches, dance clubs, and plentiful cocktails. But apparently locals need some de-stressers a lot more than most tourists. According to the latest Forbes.com listicle, Miami is the sixth most stressed city in…

You Have Through September 12 to Legally Hunt Alligators

Hey, hunters, now that the thrill of python-hunting season has come and gone, it’s time to get out there and kill some indigenous deadly reptiles. Yes, it’s time once again for one of Florida’s public alligator hunts. The season kicked off last Sunday and will continue through September 12. Of…

Whose GQ Cover Is Better: LeBron or Dwyane’s?

LeBron James is the cover boy for the all-important September issue of GQ, and in the interview, he has some perplexing things to say about Cleveland. Namely, that growing up in nearby Akron, he kind of hated Cleveland, but he’s open to the idea of one day returning to the…

Alex Sink to Pick Boring Rod Smith as Running Mate

According to two state papers, Florida gubernatorial candidate Alex Sink is set to announce Rod Smith as her running mate this Thursday at an event in West Palm Beach. Yawn. A former state senator, Smith lost the 2006 Democratic primary for governor to similarly boring Jim Davis. The move seems…